There are many lessons available for learning quite
frequently in my life it seems. Now, whether I have the patience, the will, the
keen eye to notice and learn them is a different story. But, I hope these blunders
can be looked back upon as a comedy rather than a tragedy, for I love to learn.
Some lessons, well, they come in stages and are to be built
upon. For me, one of those recurring lessons is dependence. I have always been
one to seek God’s plans for my life. I’m not afraid to dream big, for I know he
has big plans. But my default in discovering those plans is to say to God,
“Wow, that’s a great plan. That’s amazing. Ok, I’ll get back to you with how
it’s going in a little while. Thanks for this ‘next step.’” You see, I love to
get God’s input about what to do, but as soon as I feel like he is revealing
those things to me, I immediately try to make them happen with my own strength
and abilities, instead of allowing Him to make them happen through me. It’s
quite a struggle for me.
When I was in college, I had some fish. Now, one of those
fish, an angel fish named Romeo, decided one day to jump right out of the tank.
No one was around, and sadly we all know what happens to a fish out of water.
It can’t survive. At first I thought this fish’s need for water was like my
dependency on God. That I was fully surrounded by him and if I didn't depend on
him I was jumping out of the water. That if I would not depend on him, I could
not survive. On a deep, eternal level, that is true. I realized though, on a
day to day level of following after God and being obedient to his will, that
dependency looks a little different.
Take this flower, for example. What does it need to survive? The sun. And in which
direction do flowers grow? Toward the sun. They intentionally seek out the
direction of their source of life. They move toward it. When they don’t get
enough sunlight, they become weak and unhealthy. The same is true for my
dependency on God, I must strive to seek him out. I am not simply submerged in
his sustenance and must not jump out of it completely – like that little fish
out of the water. I must be intentional in consciously being aware that He
alone is my source of strength and even life. I must seek, little by little in
all the daily activities, the source of my strength. When that becomes a focus,
then my actions will be based on that truth, rather than my stubbornness to try
and do things myself. I can choose to depend on him to make the small things
happen and have eternal value, or I can depend on myself, and often be faced
with those failures. Let me get more practical. I can choose to depend on God
to make CHE better and effective in these new communities, or I can rely on my
own strength, feeling as though the success of the program depends on my
ability to encourage and follow up with the new trainers. I can seek God to be
my strength to work through me, trusting him to help me to know how to do that
the best that I can, or racking my brain trying plan the best way for me to do
these things. Not that it’s a bad thing to plan or seek advice from experience
and trained people, but it’s important to know who really makes it happen; to
know who really brings transformation.
One thing I also noticed about flowers, when they are
getting the proper amount of sunlight, they have the strength to survive the
night without light. When I know and acknowledge that God is my source and it
is only through him that I can do anything he asks of me, then I will have the
strength to keep going, even when he doesn't seem near. The effects of His work
in me are still taking place, as he leads me on to be used by him.
My prayer is that we all may learn a little more what it means
to be dependent upon our mighty creator and loving father; that we may
experience walking in surrender to him, feeling the goodness of life with him.
And as we surrender, may our eyes be opened to how much more is possible
through Him than through ourselves.
 |
| Here some new trainers take tea with CHE Trainer Pasquale from Kullo (far right) |
Would you pray for me that in my last month here in Tonj I
can be completely dependent upon God for the work of this ministry and these
CHE communities. Pray also that our CHE teams and communities will also
experience that dependence upon God. Pray for our first group of communities as
they finish up committee training and prepare for selection of CHEs to lead
home visits:
1.
Guaria
2.
Kullo
3.
Malony
4.
Lurchuk
5.
Tonj
And for our new, second group of communities in this area
(those trained in May) as they work to complete their first seed project, form
a prayer team, and build a dish rack for their home:
1.
Warrak
2.
Bobi
3.
Robyibi
4.
Timthok
5.
Werkok
Grace and Peace to you in becoming dependent upon our great God.
